Article Type : Short communication
Authors : Mody J
Keywords : Neuroscience & Psychology
Men were socially programmed
from prehistoric days, when they were hunter-gatherers, to ‘take charge’ of
their families. They were the ‘providers’ and ‘protectors’. They were expected
to be strong & powerful. Their word was the law for their families.
This programming of men
seemed to continue through the ages. Even today, the man of the family is
expected to be in charge, be protective, earn, bring food onto the table, etc.
Consequently to achieve
this role, men needed to be strong, aggressive, controlling, protective. Possibly,
all this led to a certain kind of arrogance. Women were considered by both
sexes to be the weaker sex. The men took all the decisions. There were no rape
laws then. Social norms and laws were then formed on this basis. In the UK, a
wife was regarded by law to be a mans ‘chattel’.
Even in the so-called
'enlightened' society of ancient Greece — where the concept of democracy
supposedly originated — women had no property or political rights, and were
forbidden to leave their homes after dark. Similarly, in ancient Rome women
were unable to take part in social events (except as employed 'escort girls')
and were only allowed to leave their homes with their husband or a male
relative.
In Victoria times, the
suppression of women was even more severe. Women developed an illness that came
to be known as ‘Hysteria’. Sigmund Freud started his career by treating
hysteria with hypnosis. The word ‘hysteria’ comprised 2 Greek words, ‘Hys’ and
‘Teria’. (Explain). ...
In more recent years,
during the 20th century, 2 psychoanalysts, Dr. Dan Kindlon & Dr. Michael
Thompson, came out with a best selling book called, ‘Raising Cain’. This was
based on his research on the plight of the boy child. So far everyone had been
focusing on the plight of the girl child, and with good cause no doubt. But the
boy child seemed to have his own set of problems, which were going largely
ignored by society.
Over the millennia,
society imposed certain expectations of the boy child. These expectations
centered on the belief that boys must never cry or be afraid. They have to be
strong, or at least show themselves as being strong and unafraid. This puts a
heavy toll on the young boy child. He then has to wear this mask for the rest
of his life until he meets a woman he falls in love with.
So once again the social
programming of man is reinforced.
According to Dennis
Prager, who runs a YouTube channel called the Prager University, Men are
programmed by nature to respond sexually to the Visual.
The visual alone arouses
men. It takes more to arouse a woman than seeing a naked man. But for a man, as
today’s commercial messages, TV, advertisements, shows that merely looking at a
woman’s legs, or even just her ankles can arouse men. Imagine an advertisement
for any product showing off a mans legs!!! That would certainly not be alluring
to anybody.
If a woman wants to
understand male sexuality, the first thing she has to understand is the power
of the visual ......
Some women do understand
this well....
We thus see a movement,
which I call the ‘Torn Jeans’ phenomena. (Explain).
And, many women already
understand this, yet many women wonder if that is all there is to a man?
Biologically speaking,
men are hardwired to take note of certain parts of a woman’s body, her clothes,
and even her posture when they first see her. By gearing up these parts of your
body, you can increase your chances of getting a date - or just ward off
creeps.
And we all know that we
all expect that men should always make the first move, take the intiative.
Right?
Your Eyes. 70% of men say
that they notice a woman’s eyes first. Our eyes tell us a lot about our
personality. A sultry look, great eye makeup, and an overall “clear” look in
the eye will make most men intrigued enough to want to talk to you.
REBEL CIRCUS MAGAZINE.
It is completely normal
for heterosexual men to see women to whom they are sexually attracted as sex
objects.
DENNIS PRAGER.
One reason for this is
the almost unique power of the visual to sexually arouse men. Men are aroused
just by glancing at a female arm, ankle, calf, thigh, stomach — even without
ever seeing the woman’s face. Those legs, calves, arms, etc. are sexual objects.
DENNIS PRAGER.
That’s why there are
innumerable websites featuring them. There is nothing similar for women. Of
course, a woman can be aroused seeing a particularly handsome and masculine
man. But there are no websites for women to stare at men’s legs or other male
body parts.
DENNIS PRAGER.
“Every normal
heterosexual man who sees a woman as a sexual object can also completely
respect her mind, her character, and everything else non-sexual about her. Men
do this all the time”. - DENNIS PRAGER. At least one might say that men have
the potential ability to do this, but do they really do it?
As newborn infants our
earliest relationship with our mother is limited only to a nipple on her
breast. That nipple becomes our whole world. When we are gradually exposed to
more and more parts of the mother only then can we realize that there is more
to mother than just her breasts. We have integrated all the parts of mother
that we have experienced in order to achieve this. Finally, if an when we see
our mother as one whole loving person will we be able to really appreciate our
mother for what she really is.
It is only our
relationships that can take us through a process of splitting and integration.
Our entire growth and learning, including our spiritual learning, takes place
when we allow integration to happen.
It is only when we
discover the whole person, in all his/her facets that we can discover the truly
sublime in him/her. Men who are stuck relating to only parts of a woman
represent the tragedy our human civilization is facing today. They are missing
out on discovering the true beauty that lies within. Within women, within
themselves.